Monthly Archives: March 2017

The Invisible Handicap

Standard

Chronic pain. It’s real. It’s debilitating. It makes you want to just curl up and die.29657_425099515940_6942706_n OK, well, not necessarily die, but just not have anything to do with the world at that point in time. We just want to be left alone. We hope it will go away. We are pretty sure it would feel so much better if we didn’t have all the responsibilities that come along with living. We wish the dog would walk itself and the children could just do without Mom for one day. We wish we didn’t have to go to work. There’s nothing like falling asleep after a night of tossing and turning and then the fucking alarm goes off. And then comes the stress of the job: the work, the co-workers, the clients, the commute.

Yet, people will look at you and think, “There’s nothing wrong with her. She’s just fat. If she would just get up off of her lazy ass and move around, she’d be alright.” Okay, to be honest, that’s partially true. I once had back pain so bad, I practically crawled into the chiropractor’s office. He looked at me and said, “You’re overweight. You need to walk two miles a day.” At the time, I was actually not overweight. I have wide hips, and at the time, people did not admit that a big butt was attractive. This was all before Jennifer Lopez and Kim Kardashian made that a ‘thing’. NOW I am overweight. But, anyway… I looked at the guy in astonishment. I couldn’t believe it! I could barely walk into his office, and here this fucking moron wants me to walk two miles??

Okay, well, out of spite, I decided to do it. It was a huge struggle at first. But, you know what? It worked! I started to feel better and after a while, I was able to stand up straight and actually walk.

I did feel good for a while, but you know what? Chronic pain never really goes away.  It eventually comes back – with a vengeance. And you just don’t want to get up anymore. You don’t care if you get fat. And you do get fat. Which doesn’t make matters better. But you don’t care. You are in pain.

You know, you see all of these success stories of people with physical handicaps who accomplish amazing feats. I am so happy for them, I really am. However, many of them, while they are physically challenged, do not have pain. Not all of them, but lots of them. Some are born that way and really don’t know any different. And it truly is an accomplishment for them, and I think they are incredible and amazing.

But you know what? I have days where I feel like I need a standing ovation just for making it out of bed. I feel like people should be gaping in awe that I made it to work. But, no. What do I get? Eye rolls. For being fat. For feeling pain.

Apply for disability and what do you get? Denied! Why? Because you can still sit. OK, you may have excruciating pain while doing it, but who cares? Or, maybe you can still wiggle your big toe. Or maybe you can still pick up a phone. No sympathy for you!!

Maybe one day there will be more recognition for it, but until then, people with chronic pain have to suffer in silence.

Why Performance Pay Should Be Mandatory

Standard

Have you ever had a job where you just wanted to quit because you were too good for it? You are so good that you can’t get promoted because they need you there, doing what you’re doing, because no one will ever be as good as you at it. Therefore, you are forced to work with incompetents who take advantage of the fact that you pick up their slack. The employer is most likely aware of this, but it all works out – for them. They get the finished product or end result and that is all they are concerned about.  You will never get a raise while you are in that position, but they don’t want to let you out of it.

13173626_10208897841190883_6064596124710169642_nWouldn’t it just be better if everyone got paid for their performance?  Wouldn’t that then make more people better at their jobs? What if the company took away from the slackers and gave to the performers? Wouldn’t that make things fairer? It might even open up some choice jobs for good workers to move up the line, once they weeded out the dead weight.

Most service workers should probably get paid more than the majority of office workers, and yet, they are the ones that are looked down upon. Well, at least, in the US they are. In most other countries, they are paid a decent hourly rate and are respected for what they do. You don’t get a server to take care of you – the whole staff is dedicated to serving you. And customer service is not abused and taken advantage of. I am sure there are many US servers who should be earning a lot more than someone sitting in an Accounts Payable office keying in invoices, but unfortunately, that’s not the case. 

Maybe one day all of this will change, but until then, enjoy the monotony.

Happy Easter, From An Atheist

Standard

No, I don’t “celebrate” Easter in the sense of a religious holiday, but I love decorating Easter eggs. I love the Easter candy. I love the colorful ornaments and how nice they look in my yard.

I decorate for Christmas. The beautiful lights are amazing and I hate to see them go when the season is over. IMG-20161218-WA0037

I say, “Happy Easter and Merry Christmas” because it goes beyond the religiousness. It is tradition, and that’s it. If you take it to mean that I am wishing you a happy holiday in the religious sense, and you celebrate these holidays religiously, then that’s great. If you don’t, then you don’t, but that is no reason to go ballistic over it or to take it personally.

It should also not come as a surprise that an atheist feels this way. There are plenty of Jewish people who celebrate Christmas, along with their own traditional holidays. There are many people who celebrate Kwanza and Christmas. Maybe ‘celebrate’ is the wrong word, as it is not necessarily a celebration. Often, it is just decorating and enjoying the season and the feel in the air. It is about enjoying loved ones and good times. It is celebrating life and living.

Bottom line: Who cares if you say or celebrate Christmas or Easter. If you do, you do, and if you don’t, you don’t. Whatever you do, just live and let live.